What Do You Know About Running?

What do you know about running?

This was a question that was recently posed to a runner/blogger friend of mine. Her name is Dawn, but her nickname is "The Unstoppable, Amazing, and Delightful Pink Lady". Ok, I added the "unstoppable, amazing, and delightful" part, but trust me, she's all of these things and more. Plus, she's much like me. We may not be the fastest husky in the pack, but we run because we have a passion for running, and we blog because we enjoy sharing our passion with others.

Well, it turns out that one day while I was busy training for the Chicago Marathon someone anonymously stopped by Dawn's blogsite and left the message "What do you know about running?" I'm sure this comment was intended to be an insult, but as always, Dawn addressed it with the grace of true royalty. Regardless, this question has been weighing heavily on my mind lately.

What do I know about running? Well, I know I often hear the comment, "Uh... That's funny, you don't *look* like a runner". And I also know I probably never will. Heck, I've never gone to running school, I've never won an event, and I've never even set foot in Kenya. I'm pretty sure that the CEOs of Nike, Adidas, or Saucony won't be knocking on my door anytime soon asking me to endorse their next Spring line of running shoes. Amazingly enough, in spite of all this, I've managed to complete three marathons, five triathlons, and countless road races during my newly healthy life. I'm proud to report that I've accomplished all of this merely for the love of running. During the twelve bajillion miles that I've logged, I've learned a lot about running and I've learned a lot about myself. So here's to you, mystery person.

"What I Know About Running, 2005 Edition".

1. Running makes me more sane. Some of you reading this are probably on the floor laughing, but I'd like to clarify that I never said I WAS sane. I said that running makes me MORE sane. Sure, I'm still on the edge, but running keeps me from jumping. If I'm having a bad day, the best remedy is a nice refreshing run. After a good run, everything seems a bit more tolerable.

2. Running makes me smarter. For starters, the more time I'm out running, the less time I'm spending filling my head with senseless garbage on television or in the media. Plus (trust me on this one) three hour Sunday morning training runs give a person A LOT of time to think.

3. Running makes me physically healthier. Self-explanatory. I lost 110lbs, my blood pressure is in check, and even my allergies are under control. So I'll live longer and have a better quality of life. Cheating death is cool.

4. Running makes me feel like a total rockstar. Running a marathon for five hours while a crowd of 1.5 MILLION people cheer you on? That's an audience even Madonna would be happy to pull in.

5. Running increases my sense of community. There's an unspoken camraderie amongst runners/cyclists/outdoorsy people. Especially those of us typically in the "back of the pack" who run simply for the love of running. We may not be fast, but we're out there covering the same mileage as everyone else who crosses that finish line.

6. Running helps me see things I thought I'd never see. It's taken me to new places for events, and even in my own city, I'm often out and about to see things that most people miss. Plus it gives me time to notice things that people hustling and bustling around are missing. As a result...

7. Running helps me appreciate the little things. There's nothing better than being the first person to run on freshly fallen snow or smell Spring flowers. OK fine... I don't actually smell Spring flowers, but it sounded better than admitting that my favorite day to run is actually "Crunchberry Day" at the local cereal factory. Seriously though, it's the absolute best. The whole town smells like one big crunchberry. If it's humid enough, you can even taste it. I could run forever on Crunchberry Day.

8. Running helps me bond with my friends and my dog. Although I often like to run alone, there's something remarkably therapudic about running with a partner. Man, I totally light up like a Christmas tree when I get another friend hooked on running. Let me know if you're interested in starting a running program, and I'll show you the secret handshake.

9. Running has helped me to meet hundreds (perhaps thousands) of fantastic new people. Too many to name.

10. Did I mention Crunchberry Day?

So there you have it. My abbreviated list of what I know about running. Now I'm not saying that running is going to save the world, but there's a good chance it saved my life. Come to think of it, I guess I do know a lot about running.

Chicago 2005

The Chicago Marathon was awesome. As you can see from this photo, I brought my camera phone along again this year to take photos as I was running. This is my favorite one. If you behave, perhaps I'll show you some more. So here's my OCD list of the Chicago Marathon 2005, as presented by Fat Man Running. Keep in mind that some of these numbers are approximated, as running 26.2 miles starts to mess with your head.


PREMARATHON:
100 - Percent of the 4 hour trip to Chicago that I was freaking out.
4 - Number of times I asked if we could "turn around and go home".
2 - Number of times we had to stop our way to Chicago so I could pee.
2 - Number of times my friend's dog peed on my shoes. (It's tradition. He gets really excited to see me).
2 - Hours that we were late to meet our friend for dinner, thanks to insane marathon traffic.
138 - Number of minutes spent at the marathon expo.
9 - Number of times during and after the expo that I said, "Holy cats! I can't believe I just met John Bingham!" (He's one of my heros).
6 - Number of times I shook John Bingham's hand while exchanging stories.


MARATHON:
18,840 - Seconds it took me to run the marathon.
1 - Number of friends with whom I ran every second of the marathon.
1 - Running Elvis's we passed.
1 - Running Elvis's that passed us.
2 - Number of beads I collected during the marathon. (No, I didn't flash anything. I'm a good boy).
3 - Number of runners who offered to flash me for my beads.
1 - Number of complete strangers that told me I had "an amazing spirit that she could see from miles". (Julie, if you're reading this, thank you for getting me through mile 24. You're awesome.)
14 - Number of phone calls I got cheering me on.
2 - Number of text messages I got on my phone cheering me on. (Thanks, Anne!)
4 - Number of times I cried because running a marathon is an overwhelming experience.
0 - Number of times I cried because of the pain.

5 - Mini Snickers bars eaten while running.
1 - Bagels consumed while running. (I hate power gels).
1 - Bagels still left attached to my belt when crossing the finish line.
350 - Ounces of water and Gatorade consumed during the run. (Big cheers to all of the amazing volunteers who help at the water stations and elsewhere!)


1,500,000 - Approximate number of spectators.
5 - Times I yelled to those spectators, "Come on people! Cheer us on! We didn't wake up at five o'clock in the morning to run a marathon for nothing!"
25 - Times I told a spectator, "You're my favorite fan!" (Shhhh, don't tell the others).
10 - Times I saw my awesome friends who came to support me. (Monkey Boy, Tara, Smack, Amy, Sarah, Keegan... You all rock!)
1 - Times I randomly saw a person from my highschool class.
5 - Cute old ladies banging on pots and pans with wooden spoons cheering us on.
37 - Spectators that couldn't figure out my name and cheered, "Go MATE!"
12 - Number of those spectators that figured out my shirt said "Mateo" after I had passed them, and then cheered "Oh, I mean, GO MATEO!"
1 - Spectators that said, "Hey Mateo, this dance is just for you!"


POST-MARATHON:
20 - Ounces of Sangria consumed in celebration.
150 - Ounces of water consumed since the marathon.
0 - Ounces of Gatorade consumed since the marathon.
1 - Lou Malnatti's small specialty pizzas consumed.
1 - Number of times I called my mother right after finishing.
2 - Number of times my mother told me how I sound "drunk" when my runner's high kicks in.
3 - Days of vacation to recover.
10 - Number of times I've already told people I'm running the Chicago Marathon next year, even though I swore I was taking a year off in 2006.
1 - Number of lives changed forever. Mine.


NOW, FOR THE BEST OF:

Best Quote overheard while running: "I know honey, I'm so proud of you for kicking that goal, but mommy's a little busy running a marathon right now. I'll call you back just as soon as I cross the finish line."

Best Cheer: A song in Spanish a woman sung to me - something about "Corre, Mateo, corre" (Run, Mateo, run).

Best Water Station: Mile 8. Hands down. Everyone is dressed up in costumes like the Village People and just having a great time.

Best Organized Group Spectators: the group giving away "Free High Fives" at Mile 23.

Best Sign: "Run like you stole something!"

Best Costume: Man running in cow costume, with a friend running behind him wearing a farmer's overalls.

Best T-Shirt: "ALWAYS PICKED LAST IN GYM"

Chicago v 2.0

Hey there faithful reader. How are you? I know, I know, it's been a while, but the Chicago marathon is right around the corner, so I've been running a lot. Welcome back. Oh and you first-time reader in the back of the class? Welcome to you too. I might warn you that I have a tendancy to be a bit non-linear. If I get too tangential for you, just wave something shiny in front of me. Much like a squirrel, shiny things usually seem to grab my attention.

Oh, speaking of squirrels, did I ever tell you how I got a pre-marathon massage about this time last year, and get this... the massage therapist cut the massage five minutes short. She told me I was too "squirrely" to finish the massage. Now, to her credit, she's absolutely right. I totally get all squirrely when people touch me.

*reader frantically waves shiny object in the air to get Mateo back on task*

Oh thanks. Seriously though. I'm a complete spaz tonight. Fine. I'm a bigger spaz than NORMAL tonight. Like I said, the marathon is this weekend - T minus five days and counting - so I have about sixteen bajillion and four random thoughts flying through my head right now. Granted, it certainly doesn't help that I'm listening to trance music to decide what is going to make the "Mateo Chicago Marathon 2005 cut" on my MP3 player. I know what you're thinking, but when it comes to running, my music selection is CRITICAL.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not talking that my music selection is "Holy cats, if I don't pick out the absolutely perfect marathon running songs, I'm going to die" kind of critical... I'm talking more like... "Holy cats, if I don't pick out the absolutely perfect marathon running songs, THE WHOLE WORLD IS GOING TO DIE" kind of critical. That's how much music is a part of my running. For me, running without music is like running without water. I suppose it could be done, but I'm not going to risk it. If you want to try it, knock your bad self out.

Every year, I also pick one song to be THE SONG of the marathon. Typically, it's got a killer driving beat, which just makes me want to run forever. I usually stumble upon it randomly, but I know instantly. Much like a bad head cold, it's one of those songs that you can't shake for weeks, no matter how much orange juice you drink. Now, I know this sounds like crazy talk, but this year, I think I might have actually found not only THE SONG of the marathon, but perhaps THE ALBUM of the marathon.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you... Mateo's 2005 marathon album pick of the year. "The Understanding" by Röyksopp. Weird name, delicious music. You can hear album cuts and even watch the video for the song "49 Percent" at www.royksopp.com. Now let's get one thing perfectly clear, even with the internet downloadfest going on out there, I'm a big believer of always buying the actual album. If you like what you hear, go out and buy the album. You can spare the $15. What does fifteen dollars buy you these days anyway? A gallon and a half of gas? These poor artists are trying to make a living just like you and I are.

Well, now you know I'll be running 26.2 miles to. I'm sure some of you love it, some of you will hate it. Some of you hate it before even giving it a listen. Just like brussel sprouts, I'm just asking that you taste it before you turn up your nose. Maybe it will inspire you to run, too.

Oh, and speaking of inspiration, you know what gets me all fired up about running more than music? Encouraging my friends to start running or exercising, and then seeing them succeed. Oh man. Just yesterday I watched a long-time friend cross the finish line of her very first 5k. She was amazing. Cheering her on brought me right back to when I first started running and crossed my very first finish line. Believe me, after thirty years of inactivity, there's absolutely no other feeling of accomplishment that overwhelms you like crossing a finish line. So go out and run, bike, walk, or cheer on a friend. You might just catch the bug and next time it will be you crossing that finish line.

See you in Chicago.